Pastor Sherry’s message for February 22, 2026

Scripture: Matthew 18:21-35

Yesterday and the day before that, I led a women’s retreat on forgiveness. In three talks, I focused on “Forgiving Others,” Forgiving Self,” and “Forgiving God.” All of human forgiveness takes its cue from our God who sacrificially forgave us through the atoning death of His Only Son on the Cross. I’m not going to recapitulate for you what I had to say during the 2-day retreat. However, I do want to bring to your attention the documentary film work of Laura Waters Hinson. Back in 2006, she debuted her 53 minute, masters thesis film, called “As We Forgive,” a treatment of the aftermath of the 1994 genocide in Rwanda. I was present at a church conference where her film debuted and was amazed at the story she had to tell.

Perhaps you are familiar already with the genocide. The Hutu tribe—mostly farm workers—had gained power over the wealthy, landowning, and cattle breeding, but smaller tribe of Tutsi. The Hutu waged a campaign of hatred against the Tutsi, first dehumanizing them, then urging disaffected Hutu to search out and kill them. They had been neighbors for years, living together peacefully in the same villages. But in 100 days, the Hutu killed over a million Tutsi’s, mostly hacking them to death with machetes. Twelve years later, the Rwandan government decided to let the over 40,000 incarcerated, men who had murdered their countrymen and women, go free. Many were very worried about what would happen when convicted murderers returned home to their villages. 

At this point, several Christian Churches stepped in. They trained men as reconciliation counselors to meet with victims of the massacre, as well as with perpetrators of the violence. In Hinson’s documentary, she traces the stories of two women: (1) Rosario, a woman of faith, who had lost her husband and 4 children. She had been pregnant when the murderers found her family. They macheted her left shoulder, stabbed her in her left thigh, rammed her chest with rifle butts, and left her for dead. 6 months later, she gave birth to her daughter and named her the Rwandan word for “gift.” It is clear that her faith helped her cope with the heinous tragedy. She was going about life and seemed at peace. (2) The other woman in the film was Chantele. Her father had been ambushed and killed, by 3 men, two years before the genocide. During the genocide her husband and 28 members of her family were killed. She felt God had failed her, left the Church, and appeared to be embittered and depressed. 

A man named Saveri admitted in the film that he had killed 7 people. He said what he had done had “shattered his heart,” and that he was left with “terrible guilt.” When the reconciliation counselors approached him, he seemed to sincerely ready to apologize to Rosario and to do what he could to make amends to her. He, with others, helped build her a new home and joined with other villagers to harvest her sorgum crop. She was grateful to him and was able to forgive him. John was one of the men who had killed Chantele’s father. He felt very guilty and ashamed, saying he could not look her in the face, and that he was afraid to talk to her. With the assistance of a counselor, he did ask her to forgive him. She refused, adamantly, for 3 years, but was eventually convinced—perhaps by observing the difference in others who had reconciled—to grant John forgiveness. Her village friends cheered as she stated her forgiveness, and she, John, and John’s wife became friends. Her depression has lifted, her bitterness is gone, and her face seems lighter and brighter. This is demonstrated in a second short film (7 minutes long), a 3-year-later epilogue to “As We forgive.”  [I showed this epilogue in church this morning and recommend that you locate it and the longer film and watch them.] 

These Rwandans have truly forgiven the unforgivable. They have taken very seriously Jesus’ admonition in the Parable of the Unforgiving Debtor (or the Parable of the Unmerciful Servant). I am including it below in the New Living Translation:

Then Peter came to Him and asked, “Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?” [The rabbis taught that 3 times was enough, so Peter was being generous.]

“No, not seven times,” Jesus replied, “but seventy times seven!” [490 times, essentially meaning an infinite number]. 

“Therefore, the Kingdom of Heaven can be compared to a king who decided to bring his accounts up to date with servants who had borrowed money from him. In the process, one of his debtors was brought in who owed him millions of dollars [10,000 talents; scholars say the amount was worth $400,000,000 in today’s money—an inconceivable number; currently more than the Gross National Product of 80% of the countries in the world].  He couldn’t pay, so his master ordered that he be sold—along with his wife, his children, and everything he owned—to pay the debt. 

“But the man fell down before his master and begged him, ‘Please, be patient with me, and I will pay it all’ [an offer of impossible retribution; notice he did not ask for forgiveness]. Then his master was filled with pity for him, and he released him and forgave his debt. [So who absorbed the debt? The king did, just as Father God did through Jesus’ atoning death for our sins!]

“But when the man left the king, he went to a fellow servant who owed him a few thousand dollars [100 denarii, about 100 days’ wages for a working man then]. He grabbed him by the throat and demanded instant payment.

“His fellow servant fell down before him and begged for a little more time. ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay it,’ he pleaded [notice his statement is almost the same as the unforgiving debtor].. But his creditor wouldn’t wait. He had the man arrested and put in prison until the debt could be paid in full.

“When some of the other servants saw this, they were very upset. They went to the king [like modern day whistle-blowers] and told him everything that had happened. Then the king called in the man he had forgiven and said, ‘You evil servant! I forgave you that tremendous debt because you pleaded with me. Shouldn’t you have mercy on your fellow servant, just as I had mercy on you?’ Then the angry king sent the man to prison to be tortured until he had paid his entire debt. 

“That’s what My Heavenly Father will do to you if you refuse to forgive your brothers and sisters from your heart.“

This is Jesus speaking! We will be tortured if we do not forgive. He’s not referring especially to hell, though unbelief and unforgiveness can land us there. He is implying that our own focus on what was done to us will continue to torment us unless we forgive. Remember, refusing to forgive is like drinking poison and expecting the wrong-doer to die. It is also giving them, and what they did or failed to do, space in our brains rent-free. We stay preoccupied with them and what they did to us; we ruminate over it, stay stressed, run up high levels of hydrocortisol, impair our immune system, and leave ourselves unprotected against opportunistic illnesses and diseases like flu, colds, cancer, arthritis, autoimmune disorders, etc. We unforgiving ones suffer while the wrong-doer may not care or may not even remember what they did or did not do.

The Koine Greek word Jesus uses in this parable is aphime which means—among other things—cut em loose. You see the Romans had another horrible way to exact capital punishment besides crucifixion: they would chain a cadaver to your back. It would stink and begin to break down until you became diseased and died. Imagine trying to sleep at night while attached to a cadaver. Jews in those days would be forbidden from attending synagogue (unclean due to touching something dead) and expelled from the village or town to live isolated and alone. It was a slow and horrible way to die. Jesus is saying “cut yourself free from the cadaver of offense and forgive.”

Notice, at the end of the parable, Jesus says our Heavenly Father forgives us in the measure to which we forgive others. If we fail to forgive, well we aren’t forgiven. YIKES!! No wonder those brave Rwandans cooperated with the Christians counseling them to forgive. They too wanted forgiveness. If you watch Rosario and Chantele, you can see by the end of the epilogue that they are transformed persons. So too can we be. Thanks be to God Who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ! Alleluia, alleluia!

(Side note: The Irish have contacted the Rwandans to learn how their two tribes came to reconciliation; so too have some other nations.)

©️2026 Rev. Dr. Sherry Adams