Posted on by Cheryl Norman

The Trouble with Comparisons

Pastor Sherry’s message for October 26, 2025

Scriptures: Joel 2:23-32; Ps 65; 2 Tim 4:6-18; Lk 18:9-14

Back in the late 80’s, as I was working on my doctorate in psychology, my next door neighbor was working on hers in Early Childhood Education. Her dissertation research examined how 4th grade children manage comparisons with their peers. As any of us who have raised children would know, 4th graders (10YO’s) are already comparing themselves to the kids around them. They compare clothing, book-bags, shoes, haircuts, lunch bags and what’s in them, grades, athleticism, etc. 

It even starts earlier than 4th grade, doesn’t it? Very little children compare cookie or cake size. Don’t we hear about it if their sibling or friend gets a bigger piece than they do? To keep the peace, we have to be sure things are doled out fairly. When my grandson, Noah, was 3-4YO, he would run a distance and then tell us adults that he was faster than Usain Bolt, the 8 time Olympic Gold medal sprinter from Jamaica. Our family thought his comparison was adorable because it was so unlikely, but it just goes to show how “hard-wired” is this tendency we have to compare ourselves with others.

Hoping we come out as well as, or perhaps even better than others seems to be a permanent factor in our fleshly natures.

Consider this: For those of you who follow professional tennis, Valentin Henequin (a photographer living in France), looks like and is frequently mistaken for tennis champ Novak Djokovic.  He appears to be Novak’s doppleganger, an unrelated identical twin. As a result, tourists often ask him for selfies. But a woman named Kayla Nicole had a totally different reaction to having a doppleganger. She dated Travis Kelse just before he began seeing–and is now engaged to–Taylor Swift. Kayla, who is frequently negatively compared to the singer on social media, finds it exhausting, and says it has lowered her self-esteem. Being compared to—or comparing ourselves to others—can be dangerous and destructive. Teddy Roosevelt once said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” Mark Twain took it one step further insisting, “Comparison is the death of joy.”

Think for a moment about the Biblical examples of brothers who compared themselves: Cain was so jealous of his brother that he killed Abel. Jacob cheated his twin, Esau, of his birthright as well as their father’s blessing. Joseph’s brothers were so jealous of him that they sold him into slavery, fully expecting the experience would kill him. There were two pairs of brothers among Jesus’ 12 Apostles: James and John, Peter and Andrew.

James and John created a ruckus among the other 10 when they asked to sit at Jesus’ left and right hands in His Kingdom. We are not told directly about whatever animosity may have arisen when He singled out Peter as “the Rock.” (The series, “The Chosen” depicts Peter as a clear leader, so it may be that they all deferred to him because of his obvious gifting.) 

(Concept borrowed from “The comparison Complex,” www.proclaimsermons.com, 10/26/2025).

But the point is that we are not meant by God to compare ourselves to others. The only way we are to measure ourselves is against the standard or yardstick that the Lord has for us. How does He see us? What does He want of us? This is the only measurement of comparison that really matters.

In our Gospel lesson today (Luke 18:9-14), Jesus reveals what He thinks when we compare ourselves with other people. He is on His way to Jerusalem to die when he tells the Parable of the Pharisee and the Publican (Tax Collector). As I have said here before, this is His final chance to teach His disciples about His Kingdom and how we should behave in it. He is no longer focused on evangelizing the Jewish nation. Instead, He is trying to deepen the faith of those Jews who believe in Him. His time is short, so we can assume He is teaching concepts He thinks are important for them to have to sustain their faith when He is gone. 

There are only two men in this story: The Pharisee, a man at the top of the religious ladder of his day; and the Publican or tax collector, a social bottom-feeder. Jesus shares how the self-righteous Pharisee compares himself to the tax collector. We don’t know if he was praying out loud or silently, but Jesus knew what was in his heart. Rather than talking to God, he appears to be making a speech about himself to himself. In verse 11 he boast

Lord, I’m thankful that I am not like other men. The guy is puffed up with arrogance, isn’t he? He might have said, “Thank you that You called me to be a Pharisee; I am so grateful to You, Lord!” He could have also prayed, “Thank you for so guiding my steps that I never became a robber, an evildoer, an adulterer—or even a tax collector, bless their hearts. I mean, there but for the grace of You, Lord God, go I.”

Then Jesus compares the Pharisee to the Tax Collector: This poor fellow knows he’s a sinner! He is humbled and humiliated by his past, his present, his bad choices, his wrong actions. He is so aware of his deficiencies before God, that he cannot even raise his eyes to heaven. He knows that he has denied his nation as a treasonous Roman collaborator. He knows he has alienated himself from his own people. The Romans let tax collectors set their own salaries above what they collected for them. The downtrodden Jews saw this as legalized robbery, because tax collectors profited at the expense of their countrymen. He also clearly knows he has neglected God and sinned against Him. His prayer is one sentence: “God have mercy on me, a sinner,” or “God be merciful to me a sinner” (v.13). This is the early forerunner of “The Jesus Prayer”: Lord Jesus Christ, Son of the Living God, have mercy on me, a sinner.” Over the millennia, this prayer has been uttered from foxholes, places of danger, and in the midst of traumatic situations.

Jesus clarifies the lesson from this parable in verse 14–I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.  Jesus is teaching us that social comparison (comparing ourselves to others) is dangerous. Like the Pharisee, we often consider ourselves to be better than the one to whom we compare ourselves. We tend to think things like, “At least I’m not as fat as that person,” or, “I’m not as big a gossip as that one.”

The Pharisee had a pride problem, and we know how God hates our pride! The Pharisee was also a religious leader and teacher who lacked compassion on those God had given him to shepherd. Jesus is also teaching that the best way to come before God, in worship or in prayer, is to be humble. We are to humble ourselves in the sight of the Lord and He will lift us up (James 4:10); And (Micah 6:8), what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.

Our other lessons today show us many reasons why we should be humble and compassionate as we relate to God and to others:

A. The prophet Joel (2:23-32) supplies 5 reasons:

1. God is faithful to His people.

2. God provides for His people. The Jews’ agricultural economy depended on rain. He promised them abundant food, which we enjoy as well.

3. He restores to us what the evil one has stolen from us. I went to Seminary in 1996 with an IRA of $28,000. But my teenaged daughter got sick and we were without health insurance. Also, our house turned out to be a money pit. I had to cash in my IRA (resulting in a financial penalty), and take on a fulltime job. When I graduated from Seminary 5.5 years later, the college I worked for had put money into a retirement IRA. I left seminary with exactly $28,000 in that retirement account. I knew in my heart that the Lord had graciously replaced what the “locusts” had stolen from me.

4. In the end times, He will pour out His Holy Spirit on all people, men women, sons, daughters.

5. And, most importantly, (v.32)🡪Everyone [at the end of time] who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved. 

B. King David tells us 5 reasons in Psalm 65:

1. God answers our prayers.

2. God forgives our sins.

3. God has chosen those of us who believe in Him to dwell with Him forever.

4. Our God is an awesome, all-powerful, and righteous being.

5. And as Joel will later echo, God provides for those who love Him.

C. Paul, in 2 Timothy 4:6-18, gives us 4 reasons:

1. Paul does not fear dying and neither should we because we know God loves us and that He has given to us each a ministry which He has empowered us to complete.

2. Paul had a lot of friends. Our God has surrounded us with friends in the church for the spiritual journey.

3. Even when our associates betray or disappoint us, God never gives up on or abandons us.

4. And He delivers us from danger and sustains us through attacks by the evil one.

This week, let’s try to be aware of when we are comparing ourselves to others. Let’s remember to humble ourselves in the sight of the Lord, recognizing that when we think we are better than others, it is the sin of pride at work in us. Let’s also be grateful to the Lord for…                  (1) Rescuing us and providing for us; (2) Loving us so faithfully; (3) Forgiving us; (4) Empowering us; (5) Restoring our relationships, material goods, and God’s peace and joy that Satan occasionally has stolen from us; And (6) Protecting us from “ghoulies, ghosties, long-leggedy beasties and things that go bump in the night.” 

Thanks be to God who gives us the victory through our Lord, Jesus Christ. Alleluia, Alleluia!

©️2025 Rev. Dr. Sherry Adams 

Posted on by Cheryl Norman

True Wisdom, True Greatness

Pastor Sherry’s message for September 22, 2024

Scriptures: Proverbs 31:10-31; Ps 1; James 3:13-4:8; Mk 9:30-37

A pastor was delivering a children’s sermon one Sunday in which he was trying to get them to tell him how a person might make it into heaven. 

He said, “If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into Heaven?” 

“NO!” the children all answered.

“If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would that get me into Heaven?”

Again, the answer was, “NO!”

“Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave candy to all the children and loved my wife, would that get me into Heaven?” 

Again, they all answered, “NO!”

“Well,” he continued, “then how can I get into Heaven?” A five-year-old boy shouted out, “YOU GOTTA BE DEAD.”

(illustration borrowed from www.sermons.com, 9/20/2024)

I love this story because it demonstrates the practical, literal wisdom that children sometimes exhibit.

Our Scriptures today all speak in some way about wisdom, with the Old Testament, Psalm, and New Testament readings forming the backdrop, or context, to Jesus’ Gospel lesson.  Let’s examine how this is so:

A.  Psalm 1 provides us with God’s take on wisdom.  Inspired by the Lord, the psalmist presents us with a dichotomy, a choice between two opposing options: (1) We can choose the way of sinners, the way ungodly folks behave (Psalm 19 calls this way “foolishness”); Or (2) we can choose the way of righteousness, the way a godly person behaves.  It’s one way or the other, no in between.  The Lord wants us to choose to live a life focused on Him—a life of righteousness.  The wise person, man or woman, chooses to align his/her life with God’s teaching, not that of the culture.  The wise person is a servant of (surrendered to) Christ.  The foolish person, on the other hand, is captured by the wickedness and sin advocated in the culture.  The righteous—those blessed by God—ultimately prosper, but the foolish come to a very bad end.

B. Proverbs 31:10-31 is ascribed to someone named King Lemuel.  Biblical scholars believe the description of the wise woman was told to Solomon by his mother, Queen Bathsheba.  They think “King Lemuel” was her pet name for him.  They believe this because there was never a king of Israel of this name.  They also believe this because many of us give our kids nick-names.  I called my son, David Morgan, “Rooney” when he was little; and my daughter, Meredith Claire, “Merry Sunshine.”  So, I can imagine the name, Lemuel, was a private joke between Solomon and his mom.

Mama Bathsheba was trying to convey to her son what he needed in order to live a good life.  God bless her for trying!  By the time he died, he had accumulated 700 wives and 300 concubines!  But she wanted him to realize he only needed one good woman.  He didn’t need multiple beautiful wives or dozens of women who would bring with them grand political alliances.  Instead, he would have been so much better off with one virtuous wife, a woman of character, strength, and real ability: someone faithful; a helpful partner to her husband; a woman who was energetic, not lazy; someone who would spend the family money wisely and who would manage the household (including raising children) well; someone kind and generous; someone wise in the ways Solomon was not.  Too bad that, as history bears out, Solomon did not listen to his mother (There could be a sermon in there somewhere)! 

This set of proverbs emphasizes the wisdom in joining ourselves to a wise spouse, and by logical extension, to wise friends.

C.  James, Jesus’ half-brother, is in total agreement with the author of Psalm 1.  In James 3:13-4:3, he reiterates that there are two kinds of wisdom in this world: (1) Heavenly, or Godly wisdom; and (2) earthly, unspiritual wisdom.  James says earthly, unspiritual wisdom is characterized by disorder and evil behaviors.  Consider the example of rap music star P. Diddy—if he is guilty of what they have alleged he has done, this is truly evil behavior.  He is currently in jail, on a suicide watch.  Is he suicidal because he has been caught or because he has come under conviction for his sins?  We need to pray for him to come to Jesus.  You see, earthly, unspiritual wisdom is more than us just being our “bad old selves.”

J. Vernon McGee writes, “the wickedness of the world is not merely human, but human plus something” [the devil].  (McGee, Through the Bible Commentary on James, Thomas Nelson, 1991, p.86.)

In verse 15, James says (people who are bitter, envious, or selfishly ambitious have chosen a ‘wisdom’ that)—>…does not come from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, of the devil.  As with Psalm 1, James says we are presented with a choice as to which kind of wisdom we pursue.  People will be able to tell which we have chosen by the way we live our lives.  Those of us who seek Godly wisdom will live lives that are (v.17) pure, peace-loving, considerate, submissive [surrendered to God], full of mercy and good fruit, impartial, and sincere. 

Finally, James (vv.7-8) urges us to submit our lives to God, and to resist the devil…knowing he and his minions whisper into our ears all sorts of ideas intended to lead us astray.  We need to recognize that these sinful or destructive thoughts come from him, and then tell him to beat it, in Jesus’ name!  True wisdom means sticking as closely to God as we possibly can, and returning to Him in repentance when we blow it.

D. Our Gospel lesson today comes from Mark 9:30-37.   Jesus has just told the twelve that He must suffer and die to complete His earthly mission, but they act as though they have not heard Him.  I have seen this phenomenon at work in therapy.  If I offer an interpretation of a client’s behavior before they are ready to receive it, they deny it.  I realize I have moved too quickly and have to wait to restate it later when they are less defensive.  Sometimes people just cannot receive a truth that is too different from their usual way of thinking.  

Instead of considering what Jesus has said to them, His disciples foolishly get lost in which of them will take on what positions when He ushers in His Kingdom (in an earlier sermon on this passage, I have suggested the following):

a. No doubt, Judas wanted to be Secretary of the Treasury;

b. Peter, Secretary of Defense, of Homeland Security, or perhaps Chief of Staff;

c. Doubting Thomas, the “show me” Apostle, for Attorney General;

d. The loving, charitable John, Secretary of Health and Human Services, or perhaps Secretary of Education.

e. And so on.

In another of Jesus’ surprising reversals of cultural values, He tells the 12 that true wisdom is allot like how kids behave.  If you want to be greatest, be like a child, the servant of all.  If you want to be first, make sure everyone is served before you.  In other words, be humble, loving, and not hung up on yourself.  The true story is told of St. Paul’s School of Theology in Kansas City, MO.  They had launched a search for their next dean president, and had whittled down the pool of applicants to five.  Someone on the search committee then suggested that rather than comparing the candidates’ resumes or vitas, they send a member to their current positions to locate a janitor and ask him or her what they thought of the person.  They did this and selected a fellow whose janitor raved about his kindness and goodness.  When reporting their selection, the committee stated, 

“Those who live close to Christ become so secure in His love that they no longer relate to other people according to rank or power or money or prestige. They treat janitors and governors with equal dignity. They regard everybody as a VIP.  Children seem to do this intuitively; adult Christians have to relearn it.”

(“The Measure of Greatness,” www.sermons.com, 9/20/2024.)  

Jesus is teaching that true wisdom comes from dying to or denying self— obeying God, just as Jesus did and loving others, Just as Jesus did.

This is one of those difficult lessons Jesus poses for us.  It’s so counter to our typical way of thinking.  We don’t want to die to self!  That seems as painful as turning our toe-nails backward.  YIKES!  But perhaps it might be helpful to look at it this way:  The story is told of a long ago tribe of Native Americans who lived in Mississippi. 

“They lived next to a very swift and dangerous river. The current was so strong that if somebody happened to fall in or stumbled into it they could be swept away downstream.

“One day the tribe was attacked by a hostile group of settlers. They found themselves with their backs against the river. They were greatly outnumbered and their only chance for escape was to cross the rushing river. They huddled together and those who were strong picked up the weak and put them on their shoulders; the little children, the sick, the old and the infirm, those who were ill or wounded were carried on the backs of those who were strongest. They waded out into the river, and to their surprise they discovered that the weight on their shoulders carrying the least and the lowest helped them to keep their footing and to make it safely across the river.”

(King Duncan, “Carry Someone With You,” www.sermons.com, 9/20/2024.)

Jesus is teaching the 12 and us that whatever positions there are in God’s Kingdom—and we don’t even know what those may be—are not based on strength, power, worldly wealth, influence, or even skill or gifting.  Wise persons know that to lead, we must become a servant like Jesus. Wise persons know that we need to exhibit childlike joy, faith, and love.

Wise persons know that, “If you want to walk on secure ground in this world it helps to carry someone with you.”

(Duncan, Ibid.)

Let’s close in prayer:  Father God, we bless you, we praise you and we love you.  Lord, please give us the practical, childlike wisdom to be humble and painfully honest with ourselves.  Empower us to live out the Christian virtues of faith, joy, love.  Help us to become and live out our lives as true servants of Christ.  Amen.  May it be so!

©️2024 Rev. Dr. Sherry Adams